For the last couple of weeks I have been continuing a trial
to see if it is practical and desirable to be locked into my rubber for a
pre-set time every time I don my rubber. Unfortunately it has not been possible
to make this a daily event yet, but I hope to build up to that.
Today the opportunity landed in my lap, so my mantra and
self-conditioning meant I had to act on it. I also decided to write a post this time, so you can judge progress (if any!). I wont post every day, as that would be too boring and too much of a chore, but just occasionally.
My rubber total enclosure begins followed by bondage and
once confident that I am going to be comfortable; the keys are put in the time
lock safe with the timer set for just over 13 hours of enforced total
enclosure.
After a few chores and correspondence with fetish friends I
settle down to my first session of just over half an hour of listening to my
self-hypnosis – a script which conditions me to follow my fetish ambitions.
Now, I am a couple of hours into my session and the
knowledge that I am locked in for the duration leaves me feeling apprehensive
but also very energised and excited.
Every time I lock myself in, I know I am handing over a lot
of control to the time-lock safe, the locks of my bondage and my encapsulating
rubber. I do this knowing there is small but real risk of something going
wrong. For example, I may not be able to extricate myself at the appointed
time. I might programme the safe wrong, or the safe may fail or the locks might
jam. Then there is the possibility I may find I need to get out of the rubber &
bondage early – which would be 100% impossible in any kind of hurry. I do have
contingency plans (known as Plan B &
Plan C) if I did need to free myself, but they are deliberately designed to be totally
unacceptable in all but emergency situations and both would take time to
activate. All this gives a profound weight to my feeling of having
“voluntarily” given up my personal freedom and a lot of control of my sensory
experience to my fetish, my total enclosure & my rubber skin for the full
duration of my self-bondage.
+4 hours.
I decided to take 50mg Sudenafil as a recreational dose to help
enhance the long session and help get into and stay in the groove. The idea is
it should make it more comfortable to be in rubber as my experiencing a chemically
enhanced constant and undiminishing sexual tension will focus my mind on the
satisfying aspects of total rubber enclosure and distract me from the less
comfortable aspects. Surprisingly it took well over an hour to get to its full
strength effect, but when it did my near-constant sexual euphoria did result in
any thoughts of the downsides of being locked in my rubber skin diminishing in
my mind to something very easily endured when compared to payback of the magical
rubber reverie of my enhanced fetish state.
+ 7 hours
The conditioning and self-bondage do seem to having an
effect. The self-bondage while exciting does give a very strong incentive to
pace myself and avoid ejaculation for as long as possible. This along with the
conditioning and longer sessions means I am slowly starting to regain the
deeper, less instantly gratifying and yet more prolonged sensual state I have
achieved with regular daily sessions of the past. I know I won’t really have
achieved my aim until I am many more hours in and still under this level of
control while still feeling this highly sexually exhilarated. I expect that I
will lose control well before my time is up, but I am hoping with repeated
experiments to gradually build up my stamina to former levels.
+8 hours.
Excitement is increasing now and becoming “desperate”. I was
hoping it would be controllable but think the sudenafil is tipping the balance
too far for me to be able to control myself for the next 5 hours.
+12:45 Although I was not able to maintain my self-control though
out the full length of the session, I am still comfortable, satisfied and happy
while I wait for the last half an hour to elapse. It certainly was another great
session I did get something extra from being locked in my rubber. I don’t think
I will need any encouragement to release myself from my “rubber prison” when
the time comes and the time lock safe allows me to release myself, but compared
to earlier attempts, I am also do not feel as much urgency. I do admit to
having more awareness of the time ticking by on the clock…
Sealed
