Enhancing The Rubber Experience. Chemical fixes?

After such a long time, I wonder if anyone will come by and read this post? If they do, I wonder how many of them will be moved to jot down a comment or two? I suspect that might depend on what I say. Lets see…

I haven’t written anything here for a while because I was essentially waiting for something... I do write for a reason, and this is because I have found the process of writing has helped me discover the depth of my feelings and help give me the strength of will needed to attempt to achieve some of my fantasies as actual daily life. I also want to write about something someone who shared my fetish might want to read, but there was a problem. I had started to think that I had reached a sort of “Personal Nirvana” but also realised this was the seeds of a problem….

As past readers will have guessed, my perception of my reaching my “Personal Nirvana” was because I am routinely able to achieve my fetish fantasy; which if summarised would read something like “living and working sealed in rubber total enclosure”. Or at least I can say I able to live like this as much of the time as I am ever likely be able to achieve in real life. I also know I am very lucky because I am living in rubber more of the time than most similarly minded people will ever even get the chance to try. But while this is fantastic for me, it means that I was not motivated to write here and also I was starting to struggle to find anything new to say. Meanwhile there is a greater problem: I think I may have lost ambition in my fetish and with this complacency I have started to find it more of a challenge to keep motivated. I became increasingly aware of some of the negative impacts of my chosen dedication to spending my time sealed up, and started thinking of how my time could be spent if I could summon up the courage to peel off my rubber skin. As soon as I could put all this into words I knew I was at a turning point; I could not stay were I was for long, the only question was which direction to go in. Revert back to rubber total enclosure just being a fetish whim I indulged only when I the mood took me, or plough on to “new depths”…

…and I have made my decision. It is time to experiment with new depths of perverted experience to see if this new ambition will revitalise my motivations. So it was time to review my experiences and look at ways to take them to the next level.

I had found that, once acclimatised, being totally enclosed in latex is generally a comfortable experience, although if you want to stay sealed up all day it can involve some physical sacrifices and some (more significant) psychological challenges. I found that the amount of sacrifice I felt I was making did increase as the length of time I regularly spent totally enclosed increased. For a long time I viewed this sacrifice to be just an expression of the dedication to my rubber enclosed existence. As if me, my body and my mind, were a submissive, getting off on submitting to the dominance of my rubber total enclosure fetish – my own in-built master. After all, it was being in rubber “longer than necessary” [for “just” straightforward sexual gratification] that was the centre of my motivating kink. But later I realised the feeling of sacrifice were having a slow but corrosive affect on my motivation levels and I was suddenly getting closer to the end of my will power. Then I looked at which of my sacrifices were actually necessary for my fetish and discovered that my dedication was enough if I was sacrificing spending time on activities that were not rubber compatible. If I were to tackle the remaining challenges in order to keep my mind more constantly focused on my fetish existence, I would have a more sustainable, intense and maybe even a more addictive lifestyle.

To achieve being in rubber as much as my fetish demands of me, I sometimes have had to convince myself that I must don my rubber at all opportunities, even though at that précised moment I did not have any desire to put on my rubber. Once I have got into my rubber I have never regretted being totally enclosed, but sometimes it as much a huge fetish comfort as it has been an intense perverted experience. I feel I need to get back to the intensity of experience where I was oblivious to anything other than the experience of being totally encased in rubber. Nothing short of this would eliminate the corrosive affects on my weakening will power.

It has long been an open question for me as to if my love of things like rubber and being hermetically sealed in a shinny membrane is 100% sexual in origin. It does seem very likely to be connected to sex, but I did have the same fascination in childhood long before sexual maturity. Rather than dwell on that question, what is not in doubt is that it has come to totally define my sex life. Not surprising since I did start out my sex life, at a very early age, totally enclosed in a very thin layer of plastic, complete with re-breathing bag over my head! It is obviously true that for many of us, just being in rubber when sexually aroused is a fabulous experience and this powerful experience transcends any physical or mental discomfort, which instantly melt into insignificance.

Knowing this, I have long believed that a key to maintaining the motivation needed to regularly stay in rubber all day is to try to remain in as sexually excited state as possible - for the entire time I am enclosed in rubber. I want all the sexual tension associated with rubber, the sexual and sensual stimulation of being encased and ideally some of the sensation associated with the beginning of orgasm – but the very last thing I want to do is actually ejaculate.
I have several reasons I try to avoid ejaculation, some practical but also some psychological. Starting with a minor point, I have found being locked in rubber swimming in my own juices is not a delightful state once the sexual drive has weakened (although I have had to learned to live with it!). Excess fluids also put extra strain on the health of skin and rubber. Obviously, once I have ejaculated there is also a post coital refractory period to deal with; when I find it physiologically impossible to have additional orgasms or an erection and (possibly more importantly) I can lose the sexual drive that helps me feel drawn to be totally encased in rubber in the first place. I also often suffer from PCT (post-coital tristesse) which results in melancholy / anxiety.
So in my case, I am always trying to maintain an impossible equilibrium. I am aiming to remain in a state that is somewhere between a purely sensual state and an out an out sexual excitement. As I remain in rubber for hours or occasionally even days, this is a fight that I inevitable lose – often several times in one session. And it is a loss. I have learned to stave off the moment, but I would love to be able to be in total control of my libido as well as being in control of “if” and when I climax to ejaculation…

For any human tying to stay in this sensual/sexual state while in control introduces some further physical challenges and even what seem to be paradoxes if you also are required to “function” beyond sex some of the time you are in rubber (for me this is mainly work but also social contact, chores etc). Luckily, I was blessed with what I consider to be a healthy sexual appetite – but even at my best it has often been a struggle to stay in a sexually aroused hour after hour, day after day. As I get older, I suspect my prodigious sexual appetite has started to return to what would be “normal” levels. But “normal” is nowhere near sufficient for my purposes and so I have started the quest for something to help – yes, I am talking chemical enhancements.

Systematically stated, my aims were to achieve a chemically enhanced libido, chemically enhanced physical delivery of arousal over long than normal periods, chemically enhanced sexual experience and, for when the undesirable (but ultimately inevitable) happens and I lose control, I need a chemically reduced refractory period. For the system to be balanced I need a chemical control to prevent or delay the onset of orgasm to avoid the unpleasant refractory period which is often the greatest test for those totally encased in rubber.

My quest is ongoing but early results have been good. Even with a quick bit of research it became obvious that many companies were marketing products that could help me. I quickly chose initially to go down the herbal medicine / supplement route rather than medical pharmaceuticals as there seemed to be a much greater range of conditions the herbal alternatives were targeting and many more products to choose from - such that I hope to tailor dose “cocktails” specific to my needs.

I was actually prejudiced against herbal medicines when I started, believing them to all be “snake oil” and placebo at best – but I discovered I was wrong. The medicines contain strong active ingredients and many had quick and very unsubtle affects. Some of the products I am trying are aimed at sexual dysfunction, but the mechanisms they used to enhance erections and increase libido deliver much of what I am looking for. For someone who was lucky enough to possess sexual function, taking the supplements has generally had a delightful effect for me, delivering enhanced erections over longer periods and in more physically demanding situations. Also I have seen increases semen production / volume – which enhances my experience and goes some way to help reduce the refractory period. My background libido levels seem to be constantly enhanced.

It early days, and so I am not at the point where I have methodically made my way through all the alternatives. That is only half the reason I am not going to make any specific claims about specific products. The other half is that I think I would prefer to hear other peoples positive experiences rather than me pontificate about something I have only spent a few months researching and self experimenting with. What I will say is that they are all street legal (in UK anyway) and many are available on the high street.

If you are tempted to follow my path, for now you are going to have do your own research and come to your own conclusions - there is lots of info out there on positive and negative impacts of such supplements.

Sealed

[Footnote: Critics and commentators, please try to avoid lazily rolling out the over simplistic “constant state” arguments here and particularly avoid the “variety is the spice of life” type arguments. The temptation is to say there is no stimulation from a constant state experience. Its not there is no value in these comments, but we have been there way, way, WAY too many times and I have nothing new to add to this particular debate. I just don’t agree and if you think that it is applicable to the above situation, you have missed the point and should consider rereading - or going to the pub for some alternative stimulus...]

Monday, 21 June 2010 – Limitations Of A Rubber Dependent Life

Does life in rubber limit what you would otherwise do? That’s easy to answer – yes, of course it does! However, I think the way I chose to live MY life in rubber and how it affects the quality of MY life has to be personally assessed against the alternatives. How would MY life be different without such a lot of time in rubber? What, if anything am I missing out on? This will be different for everyone.

Take some extreme examples. Maybe if my childhood dream was to be deep sea diver, wearing rubber and masks would not be such a handicap as it would be if my true vocation was to be a great athlete or a priest or a politician!?!?! Maybe rubber encasement would be a handicap if I were the sort of person who, to feel at ease with myself, had to be totally accepted by the widest possible circle of fiends and society at all times. But some of us are just a little more individual and private. Some of us prefer to socialise with a smaller circle of people who will accept us for who we are, rather than the “norm” of the herd.

I would fail the “loner” test these days, as I have got used to my social life even though it compromises my preferred rubber existence. However, it would be true to say that I am more self contained than some. Irrespective of rubber, I do not fear being alone some of the time, I do not fear the absence of hustle & bustle. I do need my own space and time. Luckily, all of these character factors do help make me more compatible with my rubber oriented life.

And then there is the question of what would I miss if I was not living in rubber? Well, for me, it’s quite a special existence. It’s actually exquisite, and yet so difficult to explain. It all sounds so contradictory when I try. I feel so at home and yet so special. I find it so comfortable and comforting to be sealed from the environment for extended periods, yet it sometimes requires dedication to want to go on after a few hours encasement.

Sleeping through the night in rubber is a huge challenge. In my case, the main challenge is in controlling my body temperature. A challenge I cannot pretend I always win. In particular, I have found that in summer I would usually over-heat if I am sharing a bed with my partner while I am totally encased in rubber.

Disrupted sleep and the general requirements of sharing life with others mean I cannot pretend to be in rubber anywhere close to 24/7. But I do still aim for a life where being sealed in my rubber skin is my normal state and everything else is just minor and hopefully brief inconveniences.

Do I wear rubber under my street clothes? Sometimes I do and it can be a great comfort. The challenge comes because often it is not possible to predict the temperature of the environments I will encounter. For example I find that public transport involves an unpredictable range of temperatures and levels exertion and I recommend it should be avoided by the rubber encased person! I like to avoid the embarrassment of leaving puddles everywhere or getting heat stroke – both frequent companions in my early days.

If I can predict the conditions are “rubber person compatible” I generally always wear rubber under my clothes. As well as being potentially enjoyable it also feels far more tolerable and clean against skin that is acclimatised to a “rubber epidermis”. If directly against my skin, cotton (and the like) feels scratchy and, frankly, soggy and unsanitary in areas like the crotch, pits and feet. If you are reading this and not in rubber, you are probably unaware and acclimatised to the feeling of sitting in your slightly sweat moistened socks, underwear and T-shirts – but I have lost much of my tolerance to it and it feels as strange to me as wearing rubber gloves would do to most people.

I often read of people wearing rubber suits under their street clothes, even when they know they will be in close proximity of vanilla friends, family & colleagues. They seem to imply that they can go undetected – but I wonder. I believe that even a all-in-one suit with a T-Shirt top would be detectable at the neck (and probably sleeves) unless you were wearing very buttoned up high neck collar. So either these people are braver than me and don’t care if a bit of rubber is showing or they are fooling themselves and people around them are suspicious or aware that they are wearing a rubber under-layer.

For situation where it is important to minimise the chance of discovery and upsetting people, I opt for a one piece suit which has a vest top (no sleeves, neck entry, no zips) under my street clothes as it is generally undetectable.

When not wearing street clothes, I generally do wear a neck or shoulder entry suit. My preference is for a neck entry suit with attached feet as it avoid problems with leaking, but anything with a high neck line or sleeves can be difficult to disguise under street clothes. The one piece suit I am in today has a single waterproof zip across back of the shoulders and is a practical everyday solution for those who crave a totally hermetically sealed existence.

So, back to the main topic. Do I think that life in rubber limit what I would otherwise do? Inevitably to some degree it does, but maybe not to the extent it would for others. Do I think I would be better off not living in rubber? Clearly not or else I would not still be in this rubber skin of mine! Am I 100% confident I am making the right decisions? I am afraid not… I ask the question regularly, but keep making the same choice, but how can I know what it would be like to make the opposite choice? There would only be one sure way to find out and I guess I am not convinced I would want to risk trying a path without rubber.

Sealed

Its funny how changes in your life can go unnoticed for a very long time. A series of small changes to your daily routine all add up and then one day you realise the way you live your life is nothing like what it once was. Some bad habits can creep in or maybe some small improvements are made.

The tricky bit for me is to decide on which changes are good and to spot any bad habits.

The changes I am talking about are, of course, related to my fetish which by its very nature is all-encompassing – a dominant factor in my life. Some may say this fact alone is a bad habit, but to me a habit is a bad habit only if it affects your ability to do the things you wanted or needed to do (or severely affect your own health other people in any way).

For certain, my fetish has rarely affected what I wanted or needed to do, at least in the past. The thing is, things have progressed bit by bit to what even I find a more extreme way of living and so I think it is about time to re-appraise. But that is easier said than done. Unpicking guilt associated with my social/cultural deviation from the very real possibility I may be letting things go too far in my quest to take me to my life to new highs of experience.

It impossible to do everything, so I have willingly chosen to pair down my life to a considerable degree in order to dedicate it to support my fetish aims. Certainly I am still discovering new levels sensual existence, along with just how sealed in you can be when eliminate as many time consuming commitments as possible, which previously prevented me from being in rubber.

Also I don’t have anything in my mind that I think I may be missing out on, but it’s easy to be paranoid when you are living hermetically sealed from the majority of society. Essentially I can do all the things I decided I needed to be able to do going into this, but know I can hardly be impartial deciding on what new things to do if they turn out to compromise my rubber lifestyle. It would impossible to be impartial when everything that goes with living in my rubber skin just feels so right for me…

I do feel like rubber is my true skin and I love being in my rubber support system. I feel so pure in here. I now find it is more comfortable to be in rubber and creepy to be in other clothes. I feel so clean, I feel alive in my rubber and dull (un-dead) when I am not. For some reason, which I cannot fathom, I feel so masculine to be in my rubber skin. Its certainly part of my personal self image.

I dread being out of my rubber skin. Being in rubber is so calming and the time out of rubber feels almost hysterical. When putting on my rubber, I crave that last item completing the seal and then I know I feel normal again.

What frequency and degree of rubber hermetic seal feels normal now is what is interesting. Certainly it has to be more complete and total than it did. If trend continues, I have to wonder what it might restrict what I am able to do in the future…

Sealed

“Am I Addicted? Is That A Problem?”

or “A funny thing that happened to me on the M4”…

As you probably all know, I am lucky enough to spend most days in rubber as I work from my home office and have no limitation on what I can wear as long as I can work and live in it. For me, that means I can usually be found totally encased in rubber from head to foot, often several layers and with mask, tubes etc. I know I am is an amazingly lucky to have to opportunity and I do not squander the chance to be totally enclosed. I am told it is not to everyone’s takes, but I have no idea why. To me it is a totally amazing feeling and the more time I can dedicate to spending totally sealed in rubber, the better the feeling gets.

But am I addicted or dependent on rubber? Well here is an episode that got me thinking.

I had to attend a work meeting a 5 hours + trip from home in order to stimulate some work to allow me to work from home for another couple of months and so live in rubber. I packed my stuff, just in case I needed to be there for more than a day and set off. This sort of thing is an essential part of my life and I thought very little about it.

It’s hard to explain what happened that day but as soon as had finished my work I found I could not make it home. It was a little like a feeling of hysteria or panic or maybe it would be better to say it felt something like disgust was building up in me, This was after less than 24 hours since I had been encased in latex and this is the quickest time the craving for my rubber skin had returned to an such an unbearable level. It usually takes days for the feeling to even start building.

I reasoned it was probably because I had previously been lucky enough to have been in rubber every single day for weeks – and this is rare, even for me. It seems that this sudden transition was too much of a mental shock for me. I ended up checking myself into a hotel and knew I must immediately seal myself totally in my rubber to calm down, and then stay in there for as long as it took to build up the resources to make it home.

I know how this sounds (mad!) and I am positively not the hysterical type. OK, if it was vital, I am sure I could have got home, but I really had the feeling that I did not want to put myself through that. It was all very strange.

The hours that rolled into days of my extended session in the hotel was incredibly satisfying on a sensual level, but it was also a slightly scary experience. I tried to blank it from my mind, but kept asking myself, what happens if I get to a stage where I cannot spend more than a few hours without being encased in rubber?

I did get back after a couple of nights in the hotel and I have been in rubber most days since that episode, but I know now there is a time coming in a week or so when I may have to spend whole days working on the customer’s site without my rubber skin. This fills me with loathing and dread. What if I actually become hysterical and cannot make it through the working day? I don’t think I have ever felt this way before, and it may not happen if I keep myself busy, but this fear has been building very slowly for the last few years.

I feel the only way that would work is to plan to spend progressively more time out of rubber in the days before I need to work the whole day at the customer site. But it is important to understand why I cannot not do this. I made a solemn promise to spend all my time in rubber unless there was a specific reason that prevented me and I cannot break this promise. It’s a vital rule that has made it possible for me to be able to dedicate myself to this wonderful, yet often challenging and sometimes uncomfortable life. I must remain in rubber until I am required to be in public where I must suddenly be without my protective rubber layer.

This is the basis of the challenge I live with. It is actually very testing to be totally enclosed in rubber for long periods most days of your life. I found a long time ago that during periods when I am able to be in rubber every single day without a more than 24 hour gap, it actually gets a lot easier to live in rubber that when there is a gap between rubber episodes. So I decided I must mentally commit to daily total rubber enclosure, whenever possible in order to make my life comfortable enough to be tolerable and so meet my lifestyle goal.

Now after years of this life, I seem to have found that if you do spend weeks in rubber every day, it seems that the mental adjustment means you find it much more mentally challenging to suddenly spend time out of rubber than the physical and mental challenge of being in rubber.

Originally I thought I had been given only 3 months to experiment with this lifestyle, so decided it was a golden opportunity. I thought it must be worth experimenting with the idea of a total rubber existence while I could. I imagined it as an extended kinky rubber vacation. As it turned out the opportunity lasted much longer and then I started to take difficult and risky career decisions to see if I could make it last longer. The opportunity to work in rubber has lasted for many years now, with only a few gaps and so I must honor my promise while I can because I never know when it must end.

So I guess this is the basis of my how I became dependant on rubber. Being so mentally dependant of rubber is perversely comforting – its as if I have reached a new level of perversion. So the question is: is the rubber dependency developing to have a pathological aspect? Should I be worried or excited? Is this a mental addiction or am I deluding myself like a rubber hypochondriac?

Sealed

Monday, 29 December 2008

Sometimes simple cheap things remind you of what it all about and also reminds you of the habits that have set in. Opportunity is a strange thing.

You can discover new perspectives just by grasping a passing opportunity. It makes you think if you would every see things clearly if opportunity did not come along or you did not grasp the opportunities that are presented to you.

Recently I have had the chance to indulge myself without the usual chores, commitments and work getting in the way. I had specific ideas how I would use such a golden opportunity for uninterrupted fetish fun - I view my fetish as fairly well expressed in my everyday wear and was think along the lines of more of the same and probably just a little more extreme. Then I did something out of character and had an impulse buy. As I am not a natural shopper and not particularly spontaneous, purchasing something I have not been coveting for months is a bit weird – but there it was - something to remind me of the fun of it all.

Such a simple thing - a cheap hood made of clear PVC. Yes that right, not rubber and not expensive like all rubber stuff. The hood in question was an inflatable hood and came with a re-breather bag.

OK – yes, I have had rubber inflatable hoods and even whole suits that were inflatable and yes I have bought many rubber re-breather bags over the years. But when u buy something, a certain spark of imagination is involved when browsing shiny new items that dusty cupboards may not rival.

The imagination was simply sparked by the memory of the intense sensation of being in a hood that is pumped up to press hard against every inch of your head. The total reliance on the breathing rubber. The deadening of sound and the effect on all other senses. Then add on a breathing bag where you have total control on what you can breathe…

Once I had bought the hood, I was not disappointed by the experience. It was just as I had imagined and for me total bliss mmm…

But then, once I had adjusted to the intensely suffocating atmosphere I had time to reflect on my usual fetish gear… And how familiar and “standard” it has become.

You see, my usual gear has to be totally enclosing while also being practical and functional. I am in my rubber skin so much that it has to be this way. Sensory deprivation and inflatable mummification has not always played a major part in daily life, even a rubber fetish oriented life like mine. Practicality dictates I need to be able to hear, see and feel to perform my work and chores. My rubber skin has to be comfortable for long periods, compatible to my body needs and to some extent take into account my environment. On a given day I may even need to be able to get out of my full hood/mask fairly quickly (30 secs) in case where I need to communicate with a non-rubber person.

So, while my usual rubber outfits have expressed my full-enclosure rubber fetish perfectly, it also is essentially designed for practicality – practical rubber is a great achievement I guess but a bit of a shock to me and makes me think of what I might have been missing out on in the last few years of developing my current “style” of rubber attire. If you do not need to be in there for more an hour or three, a much more intense experience if tenable.

Having the opportunity to go beyond the practical has tantalised me and make me think of the extreme fun I can still have “out of hours”. Why do I not mix my usual practical wear for majority of daily life but spiced up with more fun/extreme stuff for short periods during the day or occasional long sessions dedicated to hedonism.

Such a simple experience brought about by a cheap purchase has certainly got my imagination going. An imagination that has been perhaps stifled too much by practical considerations? An imagination that has not stayed along these paths since the days when my fetish was expressed by just occasional and relatively short sessions. Now rubber is a regular habit, bound up by practicality, I wonder if I am missing anything else from these early and intense experiences? I will certainly be trying to find time to remember.

Sealed

Monday, 29 September 2008 - “Golden Rules”

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Letter from Milano...

Thanks for comments from all and welcome back Magumsmoker. Good to hear from you again. How is it going?

To bring u up to date, I am still living a rubber total enclosure oriented life which has a fair amount of breath control and a lot (too much?) popper use…

Important: What is described below is an honest account of my legal use of chemical stimulation and I am not promoting or advocating you follow my example. I am not proud or ashamed - I have just come to accept my use/abuse as a personal indulgence and an unhealthy one that I accept as part of my (current) way of life. Use your own brain to come to your own decisions….

As previously mention in this blog, poppers started becoming a regular (often daily) thing when I first got serious about changing my life to achieve my fetish ambitions. It was when I made it a self imposed rule that I must live in my rubber skin every day when there was no specific reason why I could not. The poppers instantly become a daily part of the experience. This was to provide (what I thought would be) an initial temporarily coping mechanism to help make the transition to enclosure more bearable daily experience – not to mention enjoyable. I used poppers to get over the initial adjustment to the auto erotic over stimulation of living totally sealed in rubber, but somehow, despite some long periods of abstinence, I have never made it to the point where I would chose to live in rubber for very long without my chemical crutch. I have found that my chemicals cocktail are just too much of a pleasantly compatible combo with rubber life to give them up. This despite the knowledge that such a dependency is pathological (probably much worse that smoking).

At some point I rashly decided to experiment with the idea that I would give up controlling popper intake to wean myself off them and deliver myself to the oblivion of constant background use. The idea was that a very, very small constant dose would have the desired coping effects, without the intoxicating rush of traditional delivery methods that temporarily but regularly stopped me from functioning adequately in my daily tasks and, in many cases, coping as a coherent human being. I knew that this was probably folly, but enquiring minds needed to know, so extensive experiments were necessary.

The popper feed was something I dabbled with and had mixed results with and, frankly, I eventually gave up on as a regular thing, while I was refining other aspects of my kinky existence. I never reported that much on it at the time as I thought I would some day return to it and perfect it for everyday use.

Anyway, seeing as I was asked, what I did was take the essence of what Magnumsmoker has developed and adapted it for my use. For everyone else benefit, this was essentially a semi-automated, on-demand mechanism for efficiently delivering a popper dose. A portable electric air pump plumbed into a mixing vessel that could deliver a dose of popper vapor along a small bore tube connected into a gas mask. This would mix with air from the filter and produce a tolerable, but very strong dose that would deliver a suitably mind bending popper rush. Potentially this would be a much stronger and sustained experience than even sniffing direct from the bottle (which in itself is ignoring the manufacturer’s instructions).

I adapted this design for my own objectives. I wanted to see what it would be like to experience something a little less intense but over a long period – hours or maybe even all day. I therefore needed something that would work while I was at any angle – from upright, while sitting through to playing in bed. This made the portable pump less practical as inversion and gravity could potentially deliver the entire contents of a bottle in seconds – which would probably be fatal given my mask/hood combo is often locked around my neck. So for a prototype I came up with a “base station” design where the poppers and pump were static and a very long umbilical style (thin) tube connected my mask to the base station. As portability was not an issue, the system was a mains powered (aquarium) pump rather than battery powered, so would pump on days/months/years if necessary. The pump had its own flow regulating control and this was augmented with extra throttle and dump valves to fine tune the experience.

The tether of the umbilical is very long but ultimately limiting to some degree, but it also added a certain restraint appeal. It’s retraining influence making me feel more dependent on the lifestyle support systems of the base station. That was quite kinky in itself.

Another kinky aspect was that you were relinquishing control of your dose and to the machine. In “normal” popper consumption you are in control of the dose and sniff more as and when you think you want the more effect. You stop when you have had your fill. By handing over total control of the dose to the machine, you are handing control of your physical and mental experience and so it is a submissive act. This is very stimulating for me as well as a major mind fuck!

The delivery of poppers in a well controlled dose was reasonable success, although it varied depending on the charge of poppers in the reservoir and the back pressure of the gas mask and operation of the masks associated non-return valves. It certainly could have been developed further, but essentially if tweaked every hour or so, it could be controlled to deliver a consistent small dose whenever I breathed in, and stopped delivery when I breathing out (to avoid wasting chemicals).

The initial experiments tended to fail as far too high a dose was delivered. As this could be quite fun, it took quite a few attempts before lower doses than normal were achieved. Then there the effect was so initially subtle it was difficult to judge if enough was being delivered or too much. This was compounded as the effects tend to slowly accumulate in the body over time such that what seems like too little can gradually build to become too much. And if I got the dose too low, it might become difficult to know how long to wait before turning up the flow (while all the time getting frustrated and “over heated”).

There were times when I got things close to perfect, and enjoyed hour after hour of pleasant chemical emersion, but generally the experience made it difficult to function or cope beyond the realms of living a erotic, sensual, over stimulated psychotropic experience. Any task that was not connected with rubber, sex or satisfying my fetish became challenging. Achieving simple everyday functions would require expending disproportionate amounts of determined will power. This level of resolve could never be sustained for long in the face of such pleasure and it would no be long before I would find myself falling back into the heavenly abyss of total chemical rubber sensual emersion.

As an occasional or even regular distraction for a few hours it showed promise, but as a day in day out lifestyle it looked hopeless without considerable refinement. My fortunate position of being able to live my daily life in rubber was dependent on my being able to work from my home office. Not being able to function at any level beyond the hedonistic for the majority of the day was a major problem!

Then there was the shear chemical consumption. I could go through a bottle of poppers in hours and even when rationing heavily I would go through several bottles a week. This all comes with cost and the worry of its side effects – the immediate effects being on a par with a hangover.

Then there was the worry of the constant state becoming the norm, as proposed by Dark in his comment relating to constant rubber encasement. This risk of adjustment to a constant state (or constant intake) seems to apply slightly more to chemicals than to rubber encasement, although it is a complex subject. On the other hand you also seemed to get sensitized to some chemicals, such that you can actually become more badly intoxicated by something you abuse.

So for regular use I have gone back to simpler on-demand intake of poppers, basically as and when I need them. In some circumstance this could mean a good part of most days, but I seem to go through very distinct and varied cycles of chemical need.

The biggest thing I miss with this is handing control over to the machine. In fact I would like to hand over more control to such devises, such as controlling the air I breathe in addition the chemical dose as well other functions.

One day I will return my efforts to such devices. That’s why I am always interested to hear about other peoples ideas and experiences. Feel free to share here what it is like to experience systems similar to my constant popper feed.

Sealed (spending June 2008 in Milano)

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

I would like to correct any impression that still remains that I specifically aim to have multiple orgasms in my rubber suit, each time quickly trying to regain my heightened sexual state and erection, just to repeat the experience as quickly as I can. Given the last post it is hard to see how yu could have that impression, but commenter here and elsewhere may lead some into that belief. It would be more accurate to say that such occurrences are difficult to avoid when you spend as much time as I do totally sealed up in rubber with a high libido and the aim of living in a heightened sensual state. As I already hinted, I actually aim to avoid, or at least hold off on achieving ejaculative orgasm in order to comfortably achieve my fetish aims of spending long periods in a rubber stimulated state. Staying sexually stimulated but safely short of genuine ejaculation makes living in rubber feel really great to me, whereas the initial period after can be the most unpalatable (and soggy!). But I have not achieved perfection and find I do regularly fail, sometimes not making it through the day without coming several times and rarely making it though more than a couple of days. If I ever did find I could go for days or weeks without coming, then maybe I would need to set some new goals…

And that leads nicely on to the Viagra question. Well it is a big NO partly as it would be very dangerous when mixed with poppers and partly as it is not been necessary for me, so far…

I don’t like to contradict, but in the right circumstances I do find it possible or even unavoidable to hold on to some degree of my erection for hours on end, although I admit the intensity may go though regular cycles. And maybe it is a factor that changes with age.. I certainly seemed to remember being in an almost constant state if erection at the most inappropriate moments when I was in my teens :o) And yet in the last few years I have found the associated over excitement and resulting loss of control seems to have become less of a “problem”. Again maybe a factor of age but also probably as the effects of familiarization with my regular rubber encasement and the use (abuse?) of poppers which I take to curb my enthusiasm and shape my experience…

OK, so my normal daily experience is nothing like the intense experience of the build up of sexual tensions and passion in “regular” sex. Think of it as more like a sensual existence. Like living in the period of the very initial unexpected stirrings of lust found in a teenager’s pants, when some animal instinct inside them is awakened by the passing of the object of their desires. Not a rising crescendo of passion, but quite a nice feeling all the same…

Sealed

8th May 2008 is too hot

Hi to all who responded here or elsewhere. This post is inspired but the feedback and questions I have had, although keen not to do just Q & A and broaden things out.

To quash a possible misunderstanding (particularly for newer readers), I better say that I am NOT looking to spend weeks, months or years in rubber, without ever coming out for even a short break. It’s not for me to say that 24/7/365 would not be possible, but it is well beyond my current aims (I am not going to be drawn on 23/7, 22/7 etc either).

I am also not really a typical masochist and would not object to having a comfortable existence while encased in rubber, although I have often had to accept the sacrifices and mild hardships of my chosen rubber life. I sometime have chosen to enjoy this woe – for what else should I do when you think the pros outweigh the cons?

However, I am not aiming to be uncomfortable / very hot / wet / slimy or smelly. These are “luxuries” that are not compatible with a regularly living life in rubber. To this end I identified a sort of hierarchy of needs for a rubber encased person quite a while back (see Wednesday, 23 November 2005) and what I AM doing is just tackling those challenges, one at a time to steadily extend the amount of time I could and often do actually spend in total enclosure. I am not pretending I am near the end of the list and have been in this suit all week, as I have not. You will be disappointed to hear I cleaned and changed this morning…

Then the question of chastity has come up a lot recently. And, you know I think I have discovered some odd truths there. I never imagined I had any real understanding, empathy or connection with those who practice chastity. The fact that I never, ever, seem to manage to go for more that a few days without gushing forth semen seemed to make such a suggestion seem ridiculous. But, you know, things might be relative…

For someone like me who is lucky to have the opportunity to be aroused 24 hours a day in a fetish rich lifestyle, my abstinence is perhaps “relative”. The aim of my life seems to have developed to the point where I am trying to stay as stimulated and sexually alive as possible, for as much time as possible. All this while trying desperately to not get overexcited and stave off, for as long as I physically can, the inevitable orgasmic ejaculation. It results in a life of extended periods of great tension which seems to reach new levels after long periods of having my base instincts tempted. True, this eventually translates into a more sensual than purely sexual feeling eventually, but its a magically energising experience non the less.

The origin of my behaviour is a little tricky to identify and maybe my explanations are cyclic. It could be said to have its origin as part of my aim of trying to keep as dry as possible in my rubber skin. Dryness is very important to me as it enables me to spend longer and longer encase in rubber, without worrying about as much about skin problems. Then there is the undeniable association between my fetish and being in a state of having a high libido. Wanting more than anything to be in rubber when my sap is rising, while (I suspect we have all experienced this) the reversal of this feeling is often true for a brief period after orgasm. Avoiding, or at least delaying experiencing a post coital condition (with associated post-rubber symptoms) aids me in the achievement of my fetish dream - of spending long periods living a highly sensual life in my rubber skin. Like I said, its a little cyclic and self fulfilling.

Maybe once I set myself the golden rule that I must avoid stripping out of my rubber skin pot coital, I set up the chain reaction that conditioned me to live my lifestyle. But that does not explain why I wanted it so bad in the first place.

Moving on to cover the perennial “steady state” when applied to extended and longer term encasement argument, which seems to stick to my blog like limpet!. OK I guess it was an interesting conundrum, once. I accept there is probably some truth in that a person’s perception adjusts to a steady state. Yes I see how you might think it would adversely affect the novelty of long term enclosure and it certainly does to some degree. It’s not that I don’t understand the argument. It is just that practical experiments (rather than grand theories) means that I can empirically state that for me, my enjoyment and dedication to my fetish is enhanced by more regular, longer and more total rubber encasement. Now, if you like, why don’t we move the argument on to examine WHY this is TRUE for me while accepting the steady state theory (unless the aim is to brain washed me into thinking I am not happy in here… which I really am - honest!).

Just maybe it would be true if I truly did live 24/7/365 totally enclosed, but let’s not pretend I do. I would certainly risk finding out if we ever cracked the million and one little challenges that are currently stopping anyone from anything more than partial success there :o)

I don’t have all the answers, but I know there is a fine dividing line between too intense and too bland a stimulus. I feel I should say that it is untrue to think you can wear the rubber and associated plumbing that I wear and be able to totally ignore it for any length of time, even if I were luck enough to wear it every single day of the year. The truth is almost the opposite – unless I wear it pretty much daily, when I do wear it the experience is too intense and it is difficult to handle the stimulus. A break of a week and I am almost out of control the first day back in rubber. Adjusting to become familiar with the sensation is what I need to stay sane and functional. Now I have lost too many “first days back” fighting the instinct to fuck myself to death to want to spend too long out of rubber. Sounds like addictive behaviour? No shit Sherlock, that has occurred to me once or twice! :o)

Yes, you can and do forget you are in rubber for a while, but my encasement is just extreme enough to have strength to inevitably and regularly snap back onto full focus, suddenly dominating my consciousness. Typically what might happen is just when I have forgotten; the slightest movement sends a cascade of rubbery reminding sensations across my body. In fact these delicious moments are the side effect of the very temporarily reality of the steady state theory when applied to my encasement. Delicious because, in an instant, the full impact of my total encasement is played out across my senses and, much more importantly the full “horror” floods your mind. Yum…

My goodness it’s getting hot today.
Sealed

Monday, 31 March 2008 - To be a plumbed rubber object

Last time I mentioned the use of plumbing and pissing pants to allow for longer periods of total rubber enclosure without having to use suits with zip opening. For me, zips can be troublesome and can impair the total rubbery “sealed-ness” of the experience, so it’s a subject I am persistently trying to improve on. That’s why there are quite a few posts on the subject.

Although I admit to appearing to be a little preoccupied by my plumbing, its not that I started out totally fixated by body functions. However, I have long been obsessed about extending the amount of time I can live comfortably sealed in rubber and dealing with body functions just became part of that quest.

As time has gone on, I must confess that I feel some auto-erotic pleasure from just the thought of devising clean and neat rubbery solutions to what would otherwise be mundane necessarily. It’s also partly to do with giving over control to my rubber suit – which is also partly my life support – as, when perfected, everything coming into and out of my body would be managed by a rubbery extension to my latex cocoon. The all encompassing nature of this is very much a turn on for me.

The wrong (under-)trousers?
So are the rubber sheath pissing pants the perfect answer? I would say not and so I am experimenting with alternatives. I touched on some of the drawbacks in my last entry, including the feel being so different and being initially overpowering for regular use.

There is also the question of how effective they are. When worn in combination with a sheath suite they provide an acceptably dependable solution to pissing, but this combo is just too intense and different from my tastes. I have also worn them in my heavy rubber neck entry suit (diver dry suit style) where they feel a little better, but are less reliable with more potential for a small proportion of piss backing up and eventually leaking into the main suit. Not nice when you might be in there for the rest of the day.

As an alternative I have tried a set of pissing pants I bought recently in Expectations (London). I think these pants are made in Germany, they come with optional rubber collection bag with leg straps and I suspect they are actually intended for women, not men. They are open crotch black pants with a semi transparent large pouch bonded to the crotch – which dangles between the legs and is plumbed to a rubber pipe at it’s lowest point.

When worn by me, the pouch forms a snug home for the penis and balls. When I piss, the pouch collects the urine and it drains into the rubber leg bladder. As this is of limited capacity, particularly given it is in a fairly tight suit, I have modified what happens next. Essentially the leg bladder is also plumbed, this time out of the suit such that it can be pumped empty.

Pros and cons… The pouch is snug before an erection and does not feel like wearing a sheath. However it is very restrictive as soon as I get sexually stimulated, such that it cannot take up its usual fully erect position. This can be quite fun, but also it can be fairly weird and borders on uncomfortable. I have had some degree of success in it effectively plumbing away my piss, although you have to be careful when pissing as it does drain very slowly. If you want to try it yourself, bear in mind it will require some customizing to get it to fit and drain well.

Time will tell if they are better than the sheath pants, but my instinct is that these new pants are more of a prototype than a perfect solution. I think that if it were remade with a more generous pouch, it would be less noticeable to wear and would feel like being in a normal suit/pants/tights. Also, a generous pouch would function / drain better and then the wettest are would be further away from the skin.

After pissing, there would still be a lot of moisture in the pouch, which is undesirable as my genitalia would stay wet, so thinking of ways to deal with this. After pissing, maybe the pouch could be pumped with something to displace the water. I thought of liquid silicon to displace the piss and any other water based moisture. Alternatively I am thinking of an initial flush with clean water, and then pumped with air to drive out moisture. It would probably take very many changes of air to dry out and this could be automated like the cycles of a washing machine.

Other Plumbing

Of course there is more than piss to deal with. There are outputs of shit, gas, sweat and even saliva and mucus. There are also inputs of air, fluid and food.

Inputs are not really the limiting factor. If you are happy to breathe air from the outside environment (even if though a mask, cylinder, bag or tube) you don’t need to deal with the other inputs for many hours - and when necessary I have been able to go without even fluid for several days.

If you make sure you take steps to stay cool, it will be the piss problem that you hit first, probably after just a few hours. As I now have working solutions for piss and can see that I will be able to optimize these to reliably enable ever longer and longer endurances, the other requirements are at last looking to become limitations which I need to tackle.

When think of a regular session, I often find that I need to shit at least once every 24 hours. About this time frame, even when I take care not to overheat, the moisture levels in my suit are starting to become significant. At the moment I deal with this by at least one complete change of rubber every day and I have to make sure I shit just before putting on a new suit to give me enough endurance. In practice, to live a comfortable life, this brings down my time in rubber to considerably less than 24 hours. So I would like to come up with a plumbing solution – which will essentially be to have my anus plugged with enema tubes while in my suit.

Now as I have been concentrating on pissing, I have not actually got around to plumbing myself up to a enema – but I have started experiments and training. The first thing that will be difficult to get used to will be wearing a plug all the time. I have started training by “wearing” a couple of very modest rubber pipes. As anyone who has tried but plug will know, this take a lot of getting used to. In my case I think I have a smaller orifice (tight arse!) which makes the whole thing a bit mind bending. After a while the modest anal intrusion feels somewhere between unbelievably stimulating and quite uncomfortable.

I have been told that butt plugs and the like get easier to take after a while so I am persisting. Training is tough however, as imagine the pipes being trapped under all your rubber – which you committed to being locked into all day. After a few hours it really starts to drive you mad and you cannot really get at it. Like an itch, you cannot make it go away, all you can do is scratch it (wiggle you butt/pipes), which of course only makes their presence more obvious and intense.

That enough for now, but love to here any constructive suggestions or comments.
Sealed

To be a plumbed rubber object

I have long held a desire to be “plumbed” in such a way as to allow me to function comfortably for extended periods without ever breaking the seal on my total rubber enclosure. Over the last few months I have revisited this subject, determined to find workable solutions.

I have tried in-dwelling catheters, which are the ultimate as far as a plumbing solution. However, as you will see from earlier posts, they are not suitable for me. As I may be plumbed all day every day, the solution has to work when I ejaculate, and with in-dwelling catheters I have always experienced pain during climax and discomfort after. I know others have been OK, but guess I am just unlucky.

The most simple solution I have tried is to wear pissing pants (sheath pants complete with drainage tube) under a all in one cat-suit with it’s own sheath. The only holes in this suit are eyes, nostril, mouth and a very small hole in the tip of the sheath that is just large enough to feed the pissing pant’s drainage tube through. The end of the tube is plugged with a valve and the whole bundle sits in a zip up pouch, which is part of the suit. When I need to pass water, I just unzip the pouch and extract my sheathed member, open the valve, point it into the toilet and relieve myself. If I am careful, it can be a successful and clean(ish) operation.

This sheath arrangement is one I “forced” myself to regularly wear over a several months. I say forced, as although it mechanically works fairly well, it is a little difficult to get used to wearing when I am so used to just being in a “normal” rubber suit. Two layers of close fitting rubber over my cock and balls, plus the pouch can feel restrictive and very difficult to ignore! Initially it was very challenging during the normal cycles of varying degrees of penis stiffness.

The rubber used to chafe and so it is more critical to get the correct amount of lubrication. Yet over lubrication (particularly with J-Lube) can lead to the total loss of that delicious rubbery sensation that I desired in the first place.

The other thing I found difficult to get used to was the feeling of my cock and balls being effectively free and outside the restriction of the main suit, albeit in their own triple layer of rubber. The outer pouch is quite lose fitting and do not support my bits. Being more used to them being squished snuggly in a suit, along with the rest of me, it can feel like they are dangling unprotected (which they not really).

Also there is less to “push against” to get that erotic rubber feel flowing across my sex organ. With a normal suit, my penis sits with my body on one side of it and the tightly stretched rubber on the other. With every slight movement of my lower abdomen, hips or legs, the three surfaces move relative to each other to produce the delightful sensation I imagine only male rubber fetishists experience. This can be the intense erotic feel when after instant gratification, or for those of us who like to spend extended periods in their rubber skin, it can also be the gentle but regular sensual reminder of their rubber encased existence.

With the rubber sheathed option, there is the constant distracting sensation of the rubber constriction, but the penis often does not automatically get the same rubber rubbing across you skin feeling I get for free when just living in a normal suit. To get something like that you need to actively engage in a sexual act – either by plugging your rubber member into a sexual partner or masturbation. Both these are great but intense and so hardly a lifestyle.

In fact the intense feeling of being plumbed was part of the challenge which made it more taxing for me to wear for long periods. It was ironic that the plumbing that could help me in my ambition to be totally sealed in rubber for longer, and more completely, was actually initially difficult to handle beyond a brief sexual experience in rubber.

To get to something like the same gentle level of constant rubber stimulation, I often wear yet another layer of thin rubber briefs over the top of everything. Adjusting the fit of these rubber briefs can fine-tune the whole experience.

Eventually I just about got used to regularly wearing the kit. And then I moved on to wearing the pissing pants inside a neck entry rubber suit (diving dry suit style) which meant I had to plumb the pants to a collection bag in the leg of the suit. This bag was in turn plumbed up through the suit to allow it to be periodically emptied. This was all done to achieve a very “sealed in” feel.

More on this, some different pants and other plumbing in a future post.

Love to hear on feedback and tips on this or any other issue related to living in rubber.

Sealed

October 2007: Yet more challenges and a maybe an opportunity…

Feel somewhat neglected by me? Do you even remember me? Well I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t… Anyway here I am with a new profile and new posting to let you know I still exist.

Since my last posting, I have been hit by more personal challenges – yet another death, again very close to home. I was badly hit just as I was getting back to my feet. But enough of that…I am starting to come out of that whole black period.

One interesting idea has occurred to me while all this was going on, that I would like to explore via this medium. Imagine that suddenly you are no longer tied by ANY family responsibilities and financially you are suddenly (modestly) independent and don’t have to work to earn money… Suddenly your time would be 100% your own and the prospect of a totally hedonistic lifestyle would be a real possibility.

This could all be hypothetical, of course, so let not get bogged down with individual circumstances, but consider the general concept. Think about what you might choose to do. And what might be wise to do too.

Yes, you could continue to work and now all that money you earn could go into buying fun things rather than paying the mortgage on your house and other bills. If that work was mainly based from home, basically it would be a sort of dream lifestyle for many – where you could surround yourself with all the latest toys while keeping your mind tuned into the working world. Of course your time would not be 100% your own and work commitments and trips would mean you compromise what you could do and wear some of the time.

The alternative is that you could give up work and take whatever downsizing actions that would be necessary to secure your financial future. I sometimes think stepping away from a “consumer lifestyle” may not be as bad I think, as much of the excessive luxury we surround ourselves with is probably a compensation for a time poor (money rich) life we are forced into by work. For example, I ask myself, do I really need such a nice car if I no longer have to travel a gazillion miles a year for work?

Essentially you could call it “very early retirement” and I am assuming an independent income will cover the basic plus enough for some luxuries, including the ever expensive rubber fetish and maybe some travel.

Possibilities that spring to my mind are:

Ø Spend ever more time indulging your fetish fantasy. With enough time, you could aim to get beyond the quick thrills and into the next level of sensual existence, which I have been fortunate enough to have glimpsed, if only occasionally.

Ø Dedicate yourself 100% to living that kinky lifestyle with a commitment that all your actions are now all related to fulfilling and exploring your fetish.

Ø Travel to see fetish friends whenever you want.

Ø Spend as long as you want totally sealed in rubber, building your stamina to days, weeks, months… Lock yourself in and give total control of how long you are in there to someone else.

Ø Adapt your life, your wardrobe and your home to supporting your daily long term rubber enclosure fetish.

Ø Advertise for a rubber slave to share your good fortune with, or sell all your worldly goods and become a (financially independent) latex slave in someone else’s rubber household. Whichever lights your candle, you basically spend all your time fulfilling a sensual life for each other.

If time & commitments was not limiting you and earning money was no longer an essential activity, what would you do with your new found freedom? Do you have fantasies you would need this kind of time to fulfil? Do you believe that a human is capable of living a sublime existence? Or do you take the cynical view (popularised in the Matrix) that humanity would not thrive in a utopian world. That humans thrive from battling towards a ideal as long as it is never achieved?

Also, maybe it’s worth re-examining the list and thinking about how many of these things could be achieved without this windfall?

Sealed

Monday, 23 April 2007- Life and cliché?

Is my life is a cliché – the one that goes “the only thing that is constant is change”… It kind of suits me to some degree, but it can be challenging for me and must drive some of my friends and email companions mad!

So much has happened since I lasted posted that even if any of it were on topic, it would be too much to post. Needless to say, I have been living through both “interesting” and tragic times. But at least I can see the end of the tunnel now… or is that a train hurtling towards me?

OK, to catch up and give the briefest of insights, my time living with a terminally ill individual has come to a natural, if sad, conclusion [that is as far off topic I want to go]. During this time, the pressure of the situation and my near house bound existence has taken its toll. The stress of having to drastically increase the amount of time I must live without being encase in my protective rubber skin has also resulted in an almost perpetual feeling of anxiety.

All this has meant weight gain and virtual dependence on alcohol to help me relax! The last week seems to have seen a turning point and I think I should be back to normal in a month or 3.

So, when things settle down here, I just have to wean myself back on to routinely wear rubber for longer and longer periods. I am looking forward to this, but experience leads me to imagine it may well be quite challenging, particularly as the summer is arriving. It’s much easier to take to the idea of being fully encased and snug when there is frost on the windows.

I wonder if it will be as challenging as it was the first time. I seem to remember it was a bit like how people describe growing a beard, quite difficult to feel at all comfortable for quite a while and then all of a sudden, it starts to become the norm. People who eventually shave their beard off also say they could never face the prospect of going through the discomfort of growing one again. I hope this does not apply to me and going back to a more rubber oriented (dominated?) life.

I am wondering if it may make me think again about exactly how I approach it and maybe what I chose to wear, etc. It seems to a god opportunity to re-investigate the whole what / why / where / when of my rubbery existence.

Anyway, I may be calling for practical and moral support as I get back into the fold.

Just before I sign off, I would like to say hi to Brock, who seems to be a serious devotee to the idea of training for a rubber encased life. Welcome to the blog and I hope that we hear more of each others efforts. With what I found of you on the web, it sounds like you have a planned some ideas around particularly ”total” total enclosure, including intubations, which I think many with our interests will find very interesting. I have found that there is so little meaningful info on the topic, such that I would like to encourage sharing of even the most seemingly modest experiences and endurances.

Although I agree with Brock that latex encased lifestyle is totally achievable, no one who has actually tried it would say there are no challenges, compromises or implicit limitations. On the one hand, life can get hellish and even dangerous if someone is locked in TE for even a few hours. On the other, with correct planning and conditions I have been able to spend fairly long periods hermetically sealed with zero contact with the outside world, in total comfort.

Daily life usually comprises of some necessary activities and unexpected circumstances that result in a compromised existence which, while tolerable, could be improved upon in terms of both degree of encasement and comfort. I hope that by everyone sharing ideas the whole rubber existence can be continually improved and fine tuned.

I am hoping we seem some comments or links which lead to descriptions of peoples ideas and experiences. Bear in mind also, if you go for an extreme approach to being totally sealed in rubber or plastic, then I think there’s really no such thing as a short amount of time to spend totally encased.

Sealed

Thursday, 15 February 2007

Welcome wackyvorlonm ozrubberpony & Calgary rubberman to my blog and very glad u find encouragement from my entries. I think many of us feel a sense of calm when in our rubber skin. Hope u drop by again and let us know how u r getting on. I know I will be keeping an eye on your blogs (Calgary rubberman’s is definitely recommended reading).

By my understanding, Dark is pretty much a lifestyle rubberist after all (although I should leave him to define what that means to him)... We could argue the extent, length of time and totality of the enclosure – but to what end? I happen to prefer the idea of TE (as in including the head), but often have to compromise myself on this aspect. As a very rough guide, I often think a hood and mask doubles the intensity of the TE experience for me and yet probably makes the experience 10 times less easy over 24 hours. Think about physical comfort (ears!), socially acceptability of appearance, breathing (particularly when asleep), over-heating, communicating (both muffles voice and loses facial expression), drinking, eating…

Sleeping is tricky to master in rubber TE. I found that even if you managed it one night, that is not the same as EVERY night. As we tend to sleep for just the bare minimum time that our mind and body needs, any disturbance to your comfort, however slight, can lead to fatigue after a few days of disrupted sleep.

Earlier last year I did manage to teach myself to be able to regularly sleep in fairly extreme TE when away on business – but must admit to finding the same thing more challenging to habitually achieve when at home.

This brings me on to the concept of a diary or log as described by ozrubberpony. I have often found that this is a very good way to reach “the next level” in achieving my fetish lifestyle. Just setting targets a little higher each day can focus the mind on gradually increasing your “endurance” (OK, for me, it is little to do with physical “endurance” and a lot to do with ignoring the 100 artificial reasons for not following my fetish dream). This very blog started off as a points based diary, publicly charting my progress to spur me on. Only later did it evolve to it’s current (random) format, as some found it’s original personal score table format a tad dull. By then, it had served it’s purpose as I had progressed from being in rubber through much of the working day, quite often and as the mood took me, to regularly being in rubber – most of the day, most days where I didn’t have a good reason not to be. A huge step for me.

So yes, I recommend such “divers logs” – they can be a mechanism for helping u live closer to the way you already dream about.

Sealed

Friday, 05 January 2007

Years review - some observations of my life in rubber, which may give readers an insight into what it is like...

I know many people think u can have too much of a good thing, but I just haven’t found that with living routinely in rubber. You do get over the initial “rush” of the difference in your sensation, but it is such an extreme and total experience, it never stops feeling special to me. OK, I sometimes do (briefly) forget I am wearing it, but unlike other material, it is not long before rubber firmly reminds you of its presence. This aspect is part of what makes a rubber life so compulsive. It is such a total sensual experience; you cannot ignore it for long, even if you wanted to.

I have come to accept that this regular / longer term enclosure does not seem to appeal to every rubber fetishist and some people’s skin may not even bear wearing rubber for prolonged sessions, but I whish they could stop doubting that it may suit some of us (some even seem to doubt it appeals to some of us).

Before I get too far, I am not specifically having a pop at Dark on this post – as I think he at least understands that many fantasies about the possibility of long term enclosure and doesn’t deny what is patently true. The real “living in rubber is bad / impossible” zealots are elsewhere and/or anonymous. But I am addressing some of his points because he has publicly corresponded here making coherent / rational / relevant points and because frankly, I want to close off points that seem to have been made time and time again…

For me, it is nothing like eating ice cream everyday – there is no truly accurate analogy, but let say it’s more like feeling “happy” every day, but in this assertion you could easily substitute the word “happy” for other words that describe desirable standard states (like clean, comfortable, secure, warm, stimulated, sexy, fortunate, virile, alive…). Yet only something like “encased in a rubber skin” would actually accurately describe it in my mind!

The clue may be in the (horrible) “lifestyle” tag that tends to be associated with this fetish. With such a lifestyle, the intense transitional fix / rush is sacrificed for a more subtle and sustained effect. Novelty is lost and replaced by a truly comforting, yet still stimulating experience. I think it is its own experience and defies description unless u have experienced it your self. Others have likened living in rubber to grand pseudo spiritual concepts like dedication, devotion, ritual and sacrifice that might be associated with a closed religious order. Some have said it is a much more sensual than sexual experience, maybe more contemplative like sexual meditation. I can sort of see where they coming from, but think that this sort of talk is more likely to confuse the “uninitiated” than enlighten.

Many of us are interested in number and stats connected to a rubber lifestyle, but I must admit to have become very nervous about the following terms connected with my fetish: “Permanent Total Enclosure”, “24/7/365 TE”, “23/7” (and all the “nn/7” variants) and even “permanent lifestyle”. It seems they have become loaded terms, artificially high targets for the aspiring and possibly even disgraced terms. You seem to quickly get into charged debates about honesty, practicality, desirability & healthiness while ignoring the great achievements and sacrifice made by us mere mortals. I think this is a shame and missing the point.

As I have said before, being an aspiring lifestyle TE fetishist is something you personally define for yourself. You just know it if you want to live in rubber and if you are actually living in rubber.

My definition only applies to me and develops over time, but it might include aspects along the lines of “…wearing rubber for longer than just a sexual encounter… for many hours a day… regularly / day after day / most days… wearing rubber all the time I cannot find a specific reason not to…” etc. Mundane circumstances and opportunity may influence how near you get to realising your ideal and how total the coverage. We could talk about how much time I spend sealed in rubber, but is this so important? On the one hand this would not come close to 24/7/365 and yet on the other hand, I have often been lucky enough to have had several months where prospect existed to spend much more of my time in rubber than most fellow fetishists could dream of (so felt almost duty bound to take advantage of the opportunity :o) ).

For others it might mean being in rubber the whole of (most) weekends. But that person might believe they are living a rubber lifestyle. Who are we to say they are, or are not? I would say they sound like they are very much dedicated to the lifestyle and probably having to work hard to achieve it (dedication, self discipline and sacrifices being part of the deal). I think there should be no pecking order in this lifestyle, no entry conditions to the club. The fact they are interested in the idea of living in a rubber skin and are actually in that suit for more than just a quickie is good enough for me.

I want to hear experiences from all who feel they are into longer session or aspire to the full lifestyle. Much of the same challenges, opportunities and delights exist for them that I would class them as worthy brothers/sisters. As for those who say they are in the stratospheric 20+ hours / 365 day league, I am fascinated to know more - whether there total encasement is conceptual or actual… It’s fun to explore the idea with whoever is interested.

Perhaps a little more fun than exploring the question of if we really, honestly, truly want to spend long periods in rubber. Much more fun than ice cream ;o)

Sealed

20 December 2006 – Rubber Friends

Just a quick update before I get onto today’s real subject, how rubber friends and assistance would help with a rubber lifestyle.

Been spending the vast majority of my time and energy recently on securing the necessary mundane lifestyle elements that I need in place in order to support my longer term aims of a progressively more rubber lifestyle. I have been lucky in the past to have months of uninterrupted rubber life, so wanted to build on that to get to a point where at some point in the future, I will pretty much guarantee the conditions are right for me to live my chosen lifestyle, long term. What I have called my 5 year+ plan.

From my experience, if you don’t get the mundane parts of your life under control, you don’t stand a chance of achieving long term rubber enclosed lifestyle. This could mean a lot of personal arrangements, including work, home, family / friends…. Anyway, things are starting to come together in many respects (in particular, gaining a rubber friendly income stream), with just one or two things still left to be resolved...

Now back to the main point of this enter, friends. First some feedback for my virtual friends, before getting onto a more general point.

Thanks all (here and elsewhere) for the various offers of technical help. Everything from finding someone who is better set up than me to do chlorination of my rubber, through to those with ideas on automation, breathing apparatus and chemical aroma supplies. All this has sort of taken a back seat while I have been concentrating on the 5 year+ plan, although I have been having a lot of fun with aquarium pumps, which I see as being ideal for both chemical aroma supply and (with a big enough pump) for breath play. Magnum Smoker provided a good link for info on this subject. Maybe 2007, I will get time to play more…

OZ rubber pony – think that your idea of setting targets for your rubber wearing is a very good one. That’s the way I broke through the (mainly physiological) hurdles to get to the “next level”.

Also, if you are after the same things as I am, I would say it is almost as important to make it a regular event (ideally daily) than to push for ultra long sessions. I have found that if I am out of my rubber skin for longer periods (many days), I tend to find I over-react to the rubber enclosure on the first day back in.

Sealforvr – In dwelling caths seem to work well for you and I am so envious. To me they are just associated with intense discomfort, but it seems the majority of those who have tried it don’t suffer the same problems as me. The irony is, the advocates often just use them for pleasure but don’t really need to use one - and yet for me, for my ultimate dream lifestyle, they would be immensely useful.

Anyway, I wish Sealforvr luck and would be interesting to hear how u go on. Sure u have already done the research and made informed decisions. For those who have not yet, just be sure you know about the risks of UTIs and temporary incontinence associated with very term long use.

Now a more general point about friends. The simple observation that friends who are sympathetic to your ambition to life a large part of your life in total enclosure (or other unusual lifestyle not easily accepted by society) could be very useful in making your chosen mode achievable. There are several stands to this, such as moral support, practical tips and information as well as physically being there and dealing with the rest of the world on your behalf.

It often occurs to me that a rubber enclosed person is vulnerable in the context of current society. Sure, some brave the world regularly in outlandish rubber outfits, but this is often limited in terms of the place and time when such exposure is wise, health or safe. In certain contexts, society can be very fearful of what it sees as a deviant sexual expression through fetish – particularly if u r male.

This situation puts me in mind of the Hammer Horrors, where vampires are reliant on (and in total control of) a human servant (often an Egor figure or willing virgin). During the day, the servant (or a animal “familiar”) would do the master’s bidding, while the vampire would be limited to the confines of his crypt, only being released from this bondage when the sun set. The vampire would never admit it, but they are really very reliant on others for the mundane interactions needed to ensure wine and food are waiting on the table, for when the next victim traveller comes to stay…

Anyway, you probably get the point. It would be far more feasible for those who wished to live in rubber enclosure, if support were available from others. For example a partnership where one person does the lifestyle and the other does all the interaction with the mundane world and possibly provides financial support. Or maybe, a time share where you did one month on and one month off to share the burden. That’s not to say that the servant / helper could not wear rubber, but just that they may be required to take off some or all of their rubber skin to deal with everyday issues. Meanwhile, at lease one person is living the rubber lifestyle of their choice, with nothing to worry about.

Now in such a scenario with a helper, many of the real problems are removed. The only remaining one being social isolation of the Vampire figure. This should not be underestimated, even if u think you are not a very sociable person. They would of course have Egor and possibly have a circle of fetish oriented friends. If this is not enough for a given individual, the only solution is to set up a commune of people with the same fetish TE interest. Imagine the situation with a crypt full of rubber enclosed people, doing their thing, protected by and provided for, by this month’s servant…

Sealed

Monday, 21 August 2006

It been a little while since updating here. So many things competing for my time blah, blah…

Thanks for all the comments both here and elsewhere. Seem there are many “lurkers” who only comment that they have been reading my blog after I send messages to them! This is totally fine by me, particularly as the comments have been positive. But I do welcome any contributions here as I think there are still plenty of subjects that are seldom talked about by breath play, total rubber enclosure & lifestyle fetishists.

I think Xevious may have a point about poppers – they certainly have the capacity to affect your mental function. Currently, I am just finding my way back into their use, after getting too dependent / affected by them previously. I want to experiment to see if there is a dose that works for my fetish, while at the same time allowing me to function adequately beyond pure hedonism. Early results are that mechanisation of the delivery of the vapours does work very well at providing a consistent doses, but things are still at a very crude stage so would not like to make any comment on suitability for long term use. I intend making electrical control and plumbing improvements as time allows.

But just for fairly short fun sessions, my system works fine and the long tube tethering me to the vapour pump is not too inconvenient. In fact I find it quite stimulating to be under the influence of chemical air supplied by a system which is well out of reach. If I get the dose right, I know I am certainly in for a ride!

Anyway, I will report back when I have more to say on it as a lifestyle support system, as recent exposure has been far too intense for long term use, and I am still adjusting to the experience. I don’t have an exact dose level yet, but I have been peaking at going through about three quarters of a large bottle (25ml) in a single session of just a few hours. Having said that, it is far from an efficient delivery system as a little of the vapour vents through my mask without me breathing it in and none is re-breathed.

As for the idea of my fetish existence being remotely controlled some of the time – that certainly has my mind occupied! Imagine web-cam sessions with someone where you could directly influence their experience, by tweaking their personal parameters and see the result of your action in front of u. Imagine having your stimulation / experience being controlled by someone else with whom u r in a web cam session… I would love to hear from anyone else who would like to be controlled by remote or would like to control another by remote control. And what things do other think would be good candidates for control?

It seems to be there are loads of possibilities that could be controlled by electrical means, such as sound u hear, electrical stimulation, vibrators, control of air / chemical / re-breathed air mix, fluids supplies, maybe even vision and how long u re locked in your rubber prison through some sort of set of electrical locks. I just wonder how much of this would be possible through off the shelf hobbyist items?

As for using aquarium pumps for supplying all the air I breathe, then this is something I am also interested in but have has no success in the past. The pumps I previously tried could not deliver sufficient air volume to survive off for long – but will certainly experiment with stronger pumps and report back on this idea. Anyone else tried this?

Sealed

Wednesday, 26 July 2006 - The 1st prototype

Today is the first day I have had to try the first stage of my automated lifestyle support system – the chemically treated air supply. Things are still at the very rudimentary stage at the moment, but as a proof of concept it is already proving to have great potential. I have used an aquarium air pumps, as Magnum suggested, which is hooked up to bubble through my Amyl Nitrate supply. A long length of tube caries the chemically treated air to my gas mask to mix with my filtered air. I have arrange a systems of vents & valves so that most of the pressure is lost before it bubbles through the AN and so a very fine degree of control is achievable. For the last hour I have had it set so that it just fails to break the surface of the AN and so when I breathe in, the pressure drop will cause a small amount of air to pass through the chemicals.

Enough of the how stuff – what does it feel like? Well it is certainly less of a rush than doing it the old way. This is because I have deliberately moderated the volume of chemical vapour to see if I can fine tune my experience over a longer period. The first 30 minutes or so I could hardly detect any change but somewhere about an hour in I started getting the real signs the poppers where doing their work on me. Things just seem to have slowly ramped up from there on…

T+01:30
The effect of the poppers on me has continues to ramp up and guess I am already at some form of “continues bliss”. I hope the rate of increase for the effect is going to slow down soon as I am trying to avoid getting too turned on too quickly.

T+02:00
Had to halt as effect too strong. Need to go back to the drawing board as when popper level gets lower (due to evaporation) the volume of air automatically increases due to lower back pressure and so the machine gets a bit carried away and sent me into orbit…

Still effect very good at first and just needs fine tuning.

Sealed

Tuesday, 25 July 2006

Thanks for all the practical ideas everyone. Love the idea of being under computer control so much and will get the necessary equipment once I sort out the things to be controlled – like the lifestyle support system.

Maybe there are other things about my totally enclosed fetish lifestyle that my reader think would benefit from automation and/or computer control? Please feel free to suggest. Maybe there are things they would like to be automated to enhance their experience, or maybe there are things they want to specifically relinquish control of and have commanded by a computer or another person?

In the mean time, I would like to report back on the penis probe I bought last week. It arrived very quickly (on Monday) and was exactly as described on the website. However, I am having some difficulties with it. Before getting it, my main worry was putting such a relatively bulky thing in my urethra, but basically, there was no problem inserting the plug. In fact it is quite pleasant experience and can see some interesting possibilities with play and electrical stimulation in particular.

The problem is that it does not want to stay in there for very long and drops out very easily. At first I used the lube that came with the plug and later I tried it without – all with the same result – the plug just wants to let go and drop out.

Not sure what the issue is here, maybe I have a slack urethra? But looking at it, such a sleek and yet relatively heavy object is unlikely to stay in position for long as very little actually keeping it in place. Maybe a PA would solve the problem, but I personally don’t want to go there at the moment.

I am thinking that it was worth trying but I am not convinced it will work for me as a catheter substitute.

Sealed

Friday, July 21, 2006 – Lifestyle Support System

Things have become pretty interactive here recently, and I am very happy to go with this trend. Also, the temperature has been rising here in the UK, which is less good for me. Luckily, it dropped a lot over night and is just less than 25C now, which seems to be riht on the upper limit of what I can comfortably manage for a day in rubber total enclosure.

Thanks Dark for the link to http://www.fantasyleatherworks.com/. This site is full of interesting stuff. I have to admit to being just a little squeamish about putting hard objects in my urethra – although I can’t deny the possibilities of the Thru-Hole Penis Plug are really significant (as well as “The Screw” that is in the New Products section).

I wonder if it is really possible to wear such a thing for regularly long periods without it falling out or becoming uncomfortable. Also, from the pictures, there is no obvious way to plumb up the plug with a soft rubber tube. Well I decided the only way to find out was to order one. To speed things up, I found a UK supplier at http://www.tickleberry.co.uk/pages/index.html - who are apparently “proud to be a woman owned organisation specialising in Male Chastity and the Sensual Feminine Domination of men…”. I will report back on how this goes.

Magnum… your right, I am very much captive here in many senses. I absolutely love the idea of being tethered to a sort of “Lifestyle Support System” (this gets around the whole danger of my mask being flooded by neat chemicals if at excessive angles). I think the Amyl Nitrate pump could just be the start, but concentrating on this aspect, I prefer your idea of a tube that delivers my maintenance vapours into the air mix I am breathing in my mask. That would be more consistent, controllable and would require no special action on my part to be on the preset dose. Of course it does mean I would have no way of avoiding breathing my chosen blend of chemical air, short of holding my breath! The pump would be conditioning my air at some distance and I could even be in a different room.

…This ideas is so hot I am having difficulty keeping in control today…

Of course the Lifestyle Support System could include other functions as well, from pumping away waste to supplying sustenance, temperature control, electrical stimulation, sound I hear and even the mix of recycled air I breathe. Eventually I could add the home automation systems that Magnum mentions, to provide a pre-programmed daily cycle of exquisite experiences. I think it was the Le Corbusier that said “A house was a machine for living” in 1923 – obviously a long way ahead of his time and I think we owe it to him to prove that it is a machine for a lifestyle too.

Imagine the possibilities of living the life of being computer controlled rubber unit. Once locked in you would be committed to seeing your program though. Mmmm…

If someone were to help build such a Lifestyle Support System you might just have to let them take control of your personal parameters for a few minutes, if they promised to be careful not to brake u… Just think of the internet possibilities…

I thought it was going to be an easier day today, but all this has got me very overheated and it’s only mid afternoon. Think I am going to be very uncomfortable by this evening so hope I remember why as maybe this will help. Wish I had that control system right now to help me through the rest of the long day I see stretching out before me…

I will have to distract myself by concentrating on the details – so Magnum, feel free to bore us with technical details. The programming should be easy but looking for inventive ways of using off the shelf items to achieve the physical mechanics. Let go step by step and start of with the simple chemical air conditioning, the pump & chemicals are easy, but where is an easy place to get the thin bore metal pipes from – narrow enough to go through the screw on lid?

As for your questions on how much time I spend on poppers and suffocation during a week, well I never logged it. To be honest, it is a little too hot for suffocation (respiration is one of the main ways the body loses heat) and so just I do it when I feel the need at the moment – say roughly every other day for only short periods of say an hour or so. Want much more, but frankly cannot take it and be in TE for long periods in this heat. This will not be a problem when my poppers arrive and I get my machine up and running. As soon as get going with this, I will start making a note and report back.

Although very interested in rear plumbing in the long term, this is not an issue I have to deal with until all the other short term issues are addressed (See my entry for "Wednesday, November 23, 2005" for all the TE lifestyle issue I have thought of). I don’t actually get a kick out of this medical stuff directly, but I do like the idea of this technology supporting me in being sealed as much as possible, for as long as possible.

Just a last word, please don’t expect to see entries on my trying out my Lifestyle Support System too soon. I would sooner take my time with each element of the problem. Also, I am about to embark on my next assignment which is a combination of working from home (yippee!) and being on the road part of the week (boo!), so may not have too much time over the next couple of months. It’s all part of the master plan to support my lifestyle and hope to get there at some point…

Sealed